Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Okay

Alright as of now I have hopefully invited you all to join this blog of epicness. Just to set the ground rules real quick for inviting more people to join they must meet two criteria. First and for most they must be a bro, no hoes are allowed to either write or read this blog of men. J.T. this is slightly directed at you, I know how you like to give in to all of Hannah's whims but she must not be allowed to read the blog of men. Yes that picture of that cat was for you John. Moving on, half way through writing this I realized we need more people on this blog so Matt you are going to recieve and invite, here is a little something just for you, enjoy.


So moving on now from this, Matt I'm sorry please don't be a little girl and sit there and think to yourself, haha... not cool monty, probably to late, o well. Anyways to close off this first post here is a list of thing I firmly believe if followed would make the world a happier place.
Rules For Women
This is a list of rules that guys wished women knew…
1. Learn to work the toilet seat: if it’s up put it down.
2. Don’t cut your hair. Ever.
3. Don’t make us guess.
4. If you ask a question you don’t want an answer to, expect an answer you don’t want to hear.
5. Sometimes, he’s not thinking about you. Live with it.
6. He’s never thinking about “The Relationship.”
7. Get rid of your cat. And no, it’s not different, it’s just like every other cat.
8. Dogs are better than cats.
9. Sunday = Sports. It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.
10. Shopping is not everybody’s idea of a good time.
11. Anything you wear is fine. Really.
12. You have enough clothes.
13. You have too many shoes.
14. Crying is blackmail. Use it if you must, but don’t expect us to like it.
15. Your brother is an idiot.
16.  Subtle hints don’t work. Good hints don't work. Obvious hints don't work. Ask for what you want.
17. No, he doesn’t know what day it is. He never will. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
18. Share the bathroom
19. Share the closet.
20. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers.
21. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.
22. Nothing says ‘I love you’ like sex in the morning.
23. Foreign films are best left to foreigners.
24. Check your oil.
25. Anything we said 6 or 8 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
26. Christopher Columbus didn’t need directions, and neither do we.
27. If you think you’re getting on the heavy side, you probably are. Don’t ask us.
28. Yes, peeing standing up is more difficult than peeing from point blank range. We’re bound to miss sometimes.
29. Don’t fake it. We’d rather be ineffective than deceived.
30. If you don’t dress like the Victoria’s Secret girls, don’t expect us to act like soap opera guys.
31. Let us ogle. If we don’t look at other women, how can we know how pretty you are?
32. Don’t rub the lamp if you don’t want the genie to come out.
33. You can either ask us to do something OR tell us how you want it done-not both.
34. Women wearing Wonder bras and low-cut blouses lose their right to complain about having their boobs stared at.

1 comment:

  1. Wow, great way to start off the blog, i don't know where you found this or if you made any of it up yourself, but bravo

    ReplyDelete